Wednesday, 17 December 2014

LIFE: 3 thoughts about depression



(Sorry, I don't know who to credit this picture with)

The Lad is a depressive person. Not in the way he brings down a cheerful room or brings negative thoughts to a discussion, nothing like that, but more that he sometimes sinks into times of major 'meh'ness.

As a fairly pragmatic and positive person, I struggle to negotiate these times of emotional downward spiral and make sure that the Lad feels okay. I don't want him to jump from the rooftops, I just want him to be okay.

I can't really get that across in a one-to-one conversation, because conversation at the minute is pretty one sided with occasional grunts from him, but I thought that for anyone else in a place like him or living with a person like me, maybe these three points will help you get across the grunt/convo boundary.

1. Pull your weight.
Whether that's washing up, paying your bills, organising a doctors appointment, tidying one room, putting a wash on, going to the shop or just getting dressed. You might be feeling like complete and utter shite right now, but the less you do, the more I have to. And the more stuff I have to do, the less time I have to spend just being with you and talking. Or not talking. Whatever you want. You will be surprised at how I will react and respond to even the smallest of efforts.

2. Alone time works both ways.
So you want to sit and stare at the ceiling in silence. Great, I get it. So, when I want to sit and look at the ASOS new in section, just leave me to it. I'm not ignoring you. I don't love you any less. I'm not planning ways to get rid of you. I'm just having quality time to myself.

3. Talk.
You might think I won't understand, but just try me. Just talk. Tell me how you feel. Tell me what thoughts you're thinking. What plans you have. What lack of plans you have. Tell me what you want from me. What you need from me. Listen to what I need and want. Let's just talk, okay? Maybe, just maybe, I can help you feel better.

2 comments:

  1. I myself have been struggling with depression. And still have low days. It's really hard to do the things you just listed but I find they are really worth the effort. He's very lucky to have someone like you to support him and help him through the tough days. Great post! x kayleigh // mylittlejeans

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    Replies
    1. It's always the little things that are the hardest and the things that everyone gets most reward from :)

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